


A Cure Worse Than the Disease

by dragondi



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Gen, Marauders, Marauders Era (Harry Potter), Marauders Friendship (Harry Potter)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-18
Updated: 2020-06-18
Packaged: 2021-03-04 06:48:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,638
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24779416
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dragondi/pseuds/dragondi
Summary: Remus Lupin undergoes a procedure meant to cure him of his 'furry little problem' and experiences something... unexpected.
Kudos: 20





	A Cure Worse Than the Disease

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: This was originally published on LJ (under dogsunderfoot) and fanfiction.net (under DragonDi) waaaay back in 2009. Edited slightly because I didn't know Lyall Lupin's name back then and to fix a couple of things I decided I didn't like.  
> Disclaimer: I make no money from this fic. Any characters you recognise belong to JKRowling.

"Moony!"

"Remus!"

The brown-haired boy turned and grinned, seeing two boys making their way toward him across the train platform. "Peter! James!"

"How was the trip to Greece?"

Remus felt the muscles in his shoulders and jaw tighten. "It was nice," he said. "It's a beautiful country."  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

_He was strapped down to a table, though the bonds were loose. One of the women working with the supposed 'miracle worker' had been kind enough to throw a blanket over Remus' bottom half so that he wouldn't be lying naked and exposed. He'd been grateful for it and smiled at her for the kindness. She had smiled back, but it was full of such sadness that it was more of a grimace. He wondered at it._

_"We're ready to begin, Mr Lupin," the miracle worker said. "You might want to go into the other room."_

_"No, I'll stay here, Mr Grivas," Remus' father said. "I'll stay with my son."_

_The Greek potions master shrugged as if to say, "Suit yourself". He then turned to one of his assistants. "The potion, Antonia?"_

_As she fetched the syringe, Grivas leaned over and placed his hand gently on Remus' arm. "This will hurt a bit," he warned._

_Remus wanted to roll his eyes. They all thought it was going to hurt. Every miracle worker, shaman, doctor, and Healer said that. Every time they did, Remus was reminded of the fact that they didn't know what it was like to have one's bones lengthen or shorten, to have one's muscles and skin shift and pull and spread over the new bone structure. They didn't know what it was like to rip and tear one's own skin with teeth and claws..._

_Instead, Remus just nodded his acknowledgement of the man's words and waited for the prick of the needle._  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Sirius is saving a place for us," Peter said, slapping Remus on the back in greeting. "Where's your trunk?"

"Dad's got it," Remus said, jerking his head back to indicate his parents standing a few feet away. "I was just coming to see if you lot were here."

"We'll be in the next to last car," James told him, giving a friendly wave to Remus' parents.

Remus nodded. "I'll be there in a minute or two."

He made his way back to his parents and forced a smile. "They're all here."

His father smiled stiffly while his mother reached out to run her hand nervously down Remus' arm. "Will you be all right, darling?"

"Yes, Mum, I'll be fine. I'll send you an owl when I get there."

He gave her a kiss on the cheek and turned to his father. The man still looked worried despite Remus' reassurance.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

_At first, there was nothing. Grivas kept staring at Remus with curiosity burning in his eyes. He seemed to be waiting for something. Then Remus felt the faint stirring of something around the area where the needle had entered the skin. It was cool, but not unpleasant, but it left a strange numbness in its wake. Down his arm to his hand and then back up..._

_The explosion of fiery pain in his arm made him gasp and jerk involuntarily against the restraints. He held his breath waiting for it to subside, but, if anything, it intensified. He moaned as it burned along the same path that the numbness had taken, burning through the blood vessels, igniting every nerve, threatening to make ash of the muscles that had tightened at the first flare. It slowly worked its way through his body, arm, chest, belly, legs, and then up into his head._

_The accompanying pain was agonising, hellish, and mind-killing._

_His fingers clawed for something to hold on to, but there was only the wood of the table, so they curled into futile fists. His fingernails cut deeply into his palms, leaving thin trails of blood. His legs jerked against the straps, sawing into his ankles. The leather strip across his chest prevented him from attempting to roll onto the floor in a convulsive heap._

_He began to scream, giving voice to the torment inside him._

_His father spoke, worried and questioning. Grivas answered the question calmly, impassively._

_The pain seemed to be interminable. His wrists, ankles, and throat were torn and bloody by the time the internal blaze faded away into numbness. He collapsed, barely able to catch his breath._

_"Remus?" Lyall Lupin leaned over his son, brushing the sweat-drenched fringe from his forehead._

_"Are you ready for the next dose?" Grivas asked._

_Remus' eyes sought his father's. "Dad," he croaked. "No. Please. No more."_

_"Remus, if this will cure you—"_

_"It won't." He knew it wouldn't. None of the 'cures' ever would. He'd gone along with the treatments—the potions, the spells, the examinations—for his parents' sake. They wanted so much for him to be whole and perfect and uninfected. He wanted them to be free of worry and guilt and regret. He hated that they wasted their money on possibilities. Once the money had been committed—usually without his consent—he would never refuse whatever was to be done. He owed it to his parents. He owed it to them because they hadn't had him put down like a rabid animal when he'd been bitten. They hadn't abandoned him to a Ministry-run camp for lycanthropes. They had done what they could to ensure he was given an education and a life and a home._

_But he couldn't do this._

_"Please, Dad," he begged hoarsely. "Don't let him—"_

_But the Greek potion master was turning his arm, searching for a vein..._  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

He slid the door to the compartment open and was immediately accosted by a boy who grabbed him in a suffocating embrace.

"MOONY!"

"Gods, Sirius! I can't breathe!"  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

_"I know it hurts," his father said, "but if it works, Remus, it will all be worth it."_

_Remus heard sarcastic laughter in his head. 'Hurt' didn't even begin to—_

_Another needle pierced his skin and he groaned as the numbness began to advance._

_"How many of these doses do you need to give him?" Lyall Lupin asked._

_"The wolf must be killed off in stages," Grivas replied. "Three, perhaps four—"_

_There was more to his answer, but the fire had taken hold again in the sixteen-year-old boy's body. It was worse this time, burning through already ravaged tissue and nerves, but Remus didn't have the strength to scream. His lungs didn't seem to want to draw a breath. His muscles stretched taut against the assault, and he felt something snap in his right bicep. It was too much to bear and he gave up trying to fight against it. He could see and feel blackness, cool and welcoming, lurking on the edges of his consciousness, and he lunged for it._  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"We missed you, you prat! You should have come to James' house. We had so much fun, and you missed it!"

"It's a little difficult to be in two places at once," Remus replied.

"Yes, I suppose," Sirius said reluctantly. "But, gods, Moony, we found someone to buy us Firewhiskey and we would go down to the river and—"

The dark-haired boy helped Remus stash his trunk while regaling him with stories of girls and alcohol and daring exploits.

James finally decided to curb some of their friend's enthusiasm. "Yeah, it was fun except for when Sirius got drunk and tried to dive into the river. He smashed his head on a rock and knocked himself out. We were afraid he'd killed himself at first--"  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

_There was still hurt in unconsciousness, but it was manageable. Voices eased in and out of the darkness, talking about the wolf and liquid silver and asking if he'd been unconscious for too long. He registered the fact that a needle stabbed into his arm a third time, but the ensuing conflagration forced him deeper into the darkness until he was nearly smothered in it._

_And then, suddenly, his lungs spasmed and he drew in a shuddering gasp of air. It was blissful and liberating, and the grip that the pain had on his body fell away._

_But it was still dark._

_"Dad?" he whispered._

_There was no answer._

_He sat up, surprised that he could do so. He hadn't expected to have any strength remaining and hadn't realised they'd released him from the bonds. He stood up, balancing lightly on the balls of his feet._

_Was it night? Was that why it was so dark?_

_He looked around and finally saw a light to his right. It seemed as if it were at the end of a long tunnel. It beckoned to him, however, and before he knew it, he was walking toward it._

_"Dad?" he called. "Are you there?"_

_Whispers answered him, but he couldn't discern what they were saying.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~_

"Knocked himself out for at least twenty minutes," James continued. "Scared the piss out of us. I thought he'd killed himself. He had a knot on his head the size of a Snitch." 

"But you know what he said when he came to?" Peter asked. "It was the strangest thing. He said he'd seen you!"  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

_"Moony!"_

 _He whirled about, shocked at what he was hearing. "Padfoot?"_

_"What are you doing here?"_

_Remus looked around. "I don't know, really. I don't even know where 'here' is."_

_"You were in Greece and I was at James'—"_

_"As far as I know, I still am in Greece," Remus said, beginning to feel the first stirrings of worry._

_"But you can't be there and here in Godric's Hollow at the same time!"_

_"How do you know you're not the one in Greece?" Remus asked, feeling the need to ask the question just for the sake of it. It made him feel a little more in control, a little more like himself. If he couldn't turn the tables on Sirius, then who?_

_Sirius laughed. "Maybe we're someplace in between."_

_"What were you doing before you got here?" Remus asked._

_"Oh, gods, Remus! You're missing it! We've got two bottles of Firewhiskey, or rather we did. We've worked through one of them already, and I thought I'd take a swim—" Suddenly, Sirius stopped, confusion marring his nearly perfect features. "Wait. I'm not wet. I remember diving. Don't I?"_

_Remus chuckled. "You're so bloody drunk, you don't even know what you're doing."_

_The whispers were getting louder and the two boys stopped to listen._

_"Is that James?" Remus asked, bewildered._

_"Sounds like him," Sirius said. "Who is that yelling for you?"_

_Remus sighed. "My dad, I suppose."_

_Sirius sighed. "I guess we have to go back."_

_Remus shuddered._

_"Moony?"_  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

Sirius and Remus stared at each other wordlessly. 

Behind Sirius, James laughed uneasily. "He said you met in some kind of dark room or something." 

"Really?" Remus asked breathlessly, though he didn't take his eyes from Sirius'. 

"He said the two of you talked for a while and you called him names."  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

_"It hurts there, Sirius," he admitted softly._

_"What are they doing to you?"_

_Remus shook his head and started to turn away._

_His friend grabbed his arm to stop him. "Remus?"_

_"I can't do this," Remus whimpered, feeling tears form in his eyes._

_Sirius enfolded his friends in his arms. "It's that bad?"_

_"Worse than it's ever been."_

_Sirius sighed. "Look, Moony. I know you won't like this, but just listen. Go back, tell them to leave you the hell alone, and tell your dad to bring your arse back home. Maybe you can come to James' place then, and you won't be missing anything else."_

_Remus pushed himself away. "I don't know if I can, Sirius. It burns. It's like I'm on fire."_

_Sirius ran his hand over his head as he did when he was upset about something. As he did, his expression changed to confusion again. He touched a spot on his head gingerly at first and then a little harder. "There's a lump. I don't remember how I got it." He pressed again. "I should have a headache the size of bloody Africa. Feel this lump!"_

_"_ You're _a lump, Padfoot. I'm not touching your bloody head, you whiny git."_

_They smiled at the forced bravado._

_Sirius lowered his hand. "So, no cure, Moony?"_

_Remus shook his head. "Maybe they'll stop trying now. It seems like the cure is worse than the disease this time."_

_Sirius smiled. "Then you have every right to give 'em hell about it."_

_Remus couldn't help but smile. "You think?"_

_"Oh, absolutely." Sirius grinned._

_Remus felt a tug on his body, not unlike a Portkey. "Sirius—"_

_"If you die, we won't be the same," Sirius blurted out. "Fight it, Moony. And come back to us."_

_Remus swallowed hard. "You know we'd be lost without you, Padfoot."_

_"Then we'll just have to give Death a kick in the arse and let him know that the Marauders are not to be played with!" Sirius' grin was bright, his eyes glittering with excitement._

_Something wrenched at Remus, making him stagger backward. He looked back, but Sirius was gone, almost as if he hadn't even been there in the first place.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~_

"Well, that was true enough, I suppose," Remus said, looking away from Sirius' grey eyes. 

"You didn't happen to get bashed on the head while you were in Greece, Moony?" James asked. "Maybe you ended up meeting in one of those fabled long, dark corridors heading to the light," James' voice dropped an octave and wavered like he was trying to sound spooky, but failed miserably. 

"No bash on the head," Remus replied truthfully. "Sorry." 

"A mystery lost to the ages," Peter said in a lofty tone. 

They laughed, though Remus' chuckle was more thoughtful than amused. 

"Well, come on, then," Sirius said, motioning to a seat. "Tell us about the Greek women you saw." 

"No, wait," James said, leaning forward. "Tell us first: did you find a cure?" 

"No." Sirius and Remus replied together. 

_~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~_

_Remus opened his eyes and regretted it instantly as the fire flared again through his senses. He wanted to return to his dream, where there was peace and Sirius and no pain._

_"Give him an antidote!" his dad was yelling. "You're bloody killing him! You're killing my son!"_

_"Dad..." He could barely talk, could barely think of how the sounds linked together to become words._

_"Oh, gods! Remus! Son!" Lyall Lupin muttered releasing charms and gathered his son to his chest. For several minutes, he sobbed heavily, just holding Remus as tightly as he could._

_Finally, Remus managed to lift a hand and place it on his dad's arm. "Home?" he whispered longingly._

_"Yes," his father answered brokenly. "As soon as you're well."_

_"If you leave now, there will be no cure," Grivas warned them._

_"That's not a cure," Lyall Lupin collected himself enough to snap. "It's murder."_  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

"What's the next step, then?" James asked, looking from Sirius to Remus suspiciously. He chose, perhaps wisely, to ignore their mutual answer. "A doctor in America? A lama in Tibet?" 

"No, nothing like that." Remus sat down and squirmed a little to make himself comfortable. "I think my parents have finally realised there's no point." 

He would have continued, but the train's whistle suddenly blew, making it impossible for anyone to hear for a few seconds. 

"So, no cure—" James said encouragingly once the whistle had faded. 

"No. But I'm alright with that," Remus said. "And now, my parents are, too." 

The train lurched, tossing them in all directions, but over the crescendo of the steam and the chugging of the iron wheels, Sirius leaned over and whispered, "I hope you gave them hell about it like I told you." 

Remus looked at him and grinned slowly. "As a matter of fact, I did." 

Sirius sat back, looking quite satisfied with himself. "I told you so." 


End file.
